dissapoinment.
you've been around me for quite some time. you came here uninvited, and unexpectedly. you've filled me with your bitter taste, your blazing fire. you have me questioning myself, and my capabilities. there was a moment when i thought, perhaps you are right and i am wrong. perhaps there is nothing for me. you whispered to me, "dumb. unresourceful. not good enough." you convinced me that i had nothing, and so therefore i was nothing. sinking into despair i almost gave into your demands. i almost let you take me.

fortunately, i found the fight within myself. the fight for self relief. with help from others, i am slowly understanding everything you have been trying to take from me. there is nothing you can do, nothing that you can throw at me that i cannot withstand. there will always, always, be another path to take. life is not a one way road. there are turns everywhere we go, and no one option is neccasarily the right one. sometimes, we must go down the path less wanted, to find that thing that we must discover. there is something coming for me down this new path. i have no idea what IT is, but then again maybe i don't need to care. life is taking me where it needs me to go. my plan is not the plan i need to follow. their is a higher power at work here, i must let my faith come forward. i am scared, but that will not stop me. not this time.





there is my rant for this evening. i feel better now. thank the almighty above for the ability to write. and, thank the almighty above for people who care. i am surrrounded by people who care, and for that i will be eternally grateful. one boy in particular, he said something that stuck with me. everyone reading this should apply this to themselves. it will change everything. i know it did for me.
"you are talented caitlin. i see things in you that amaze me everyday. everybody has something, i just wish you could believe that."
isn't he awesome? positively the best. someday i will be able to return the huge favor he has given me. i hope.

goodbye dissapointment. i won't miss you.

xoxoxo, little miss content.